Review: Scars by Cheryl Rainfield

If we're being totally honest, me reading this book started out as a bit of an accident. I had gone to Amazon to try and find a sample of Cheryl's book Hunted, since that was the book she was being featured for as part of Apocalypse Tour. But Amazon did not have a sample of it, and they did have one of this, so I went "Why not?". I love contemporary and I haven't read as much of it this year as I would have liked.

I can tell you right now that Scars grabbed my attention from the beginning and I actually went out of my way to grab a card to order it so that it would arrive in time for the signing. The only reason it's taken me this long to finish up and sit down to write my review is that despite being a shorter book, its design is quite heavy (which is lovely in terms of quality, not so much for my wrists.) I finally figured out that I could read comfortably at our kitchen table, though, and then nothing could pull me from this.

I'm going to try and tell you why I loved this book so much, and why I feel so strongly that everyone should rush out and read it, but I honestly cannot guarantee that words will do Scars justice.

The Plot: (Summary from GoodReads)

Kendra, fifteen, hasn't felt safe since she began to recall devastating memories of childhood sexual abuse, especially because she still can't remember the most important detail-- her abuser's identity. Frightened, Kendra believes someone is always watching and following her, leaving menacing messages only she understands. If she lets her guard down even for a minute, it could cost Kendra her life. To relieve the pressure, Kendra cuts; aside from her brilliantly expressive artwork, it's her only way of coping. Since her own mother is too self-absorbed to hear her cries for help, Kendra finds support in others instead: from her therapist and her art teacher, from Sandy, the close family friend who encourages her artwork, and from Meghan, the classmate who's becoming a friend and maybe more. But the truth about Kendra's abuse is just waiting to explode, with startling unforeseen consequences. Scars is the unforgettable story of one girl's frightening path to the truth.

Dealing with several key issues, Scars is the kind of novel that was bound to either be profound, powerful and moving, or to simply be too much. Fortunately, at least for me, I found it to be the former of these two things. Cheryl tackles the various conflicts and issues going on in Kendra's life with honesty and heart. She knows when to up the pressure or intensity, and when to take a step back or give the reader a glimpse of a ray of sunshine--a sense of hope that tells us despite all she's going through, that Kendra has people she loves and things she is passionate about that are worth living for.

Another thing that I think was fantasically done was how Cheryl turned the question of who had abused Kendra into a mystery, since Kendra could not remember / was repressing the memory until she was ready to face it. The way that this made every male character suspect--both to me and to Kendra as she struggled to deal with the fact that her abuser had started to stalk her, really helped me connect with the book and with Kendra. I felt like we were "in" that aspect of the story together, both trying to figure out who had committed this atrocious crime. 

What makes this all the more powerful is that, at least in my case, I started out curious and wanting to find that out, and my need to figure it out, and to find out what would happen to Kendra, grew more and more intense the longer I read and grew to care about her as a character. There's a point in the book where Megan (the love interest) says something about liking Kendra because she doesn't bullshit. Megan values her honesty and that same trait is what makes her so able to powerfully narrate this story. As I kept reading, I went from simply wanting the 'truth' to wanting to know, for certain, that Kendra would find a way to not only survive but actually, truly live. 

That's some pretty strong stuff.

The Characters: 

Kendra is the heart of this story, and that makes perfect sense since this is truly her story to tell. She stands out so strongly from the rest of the cast--and I want to be certain to point out this isn't a writing flaw--and I think that this was used to good effect to show a bit of the isolation she felt carrying around everything she was dealing with. I really liked Kendra. I found her very brave despite all she had been through.

The supporting cast was equally well done. The way that our perceptions of characters, while seeing them through Kendra's eyes, could shift was very clever. I particularly liked her therapist, Carolyn, her girlfriend Megan and her mentor / friend Sandy. I also thought that her shifting relationship with her parents, and the parallel between their need for things to look perfect and Kendra's need for the truth were both interesting layers. They definitely brought forth some memorable results. 

The Romance; 

I think that the relationship between Kendra and Megan was well handled. It played a valid and important role in the story, but it did not take the story over or become the central issue. Megan does not provide any sort of 'saving' to Kendra. She does, however, show something good and real and happy that makes it clear to the reader that Kendra can have good things in her life--including the love of a girlfriend--if she has the strength and courage to live each day and let her life move forward. 

I don't read a ton of same-sex romance. This isn't so much an on-purpose slight as it is a seeming genre slight. I read a lot of Paranormal Romance and Urban Fantasy and it's just not common there. What I can say, as with when I read Will Grayson, Will Grayson, is that I had no trouble connecting with this couple and cheering them on. Their romance was sweet and well done, and both tied in with the main plot and allowed some breathing room from it at times. (While we are never totally free of Kendra's issues--and we shouldn't be here--the balance struck to keep the book readable by a diverse audience was handled well.)

I think Carolyn sums it up best in the book when she is talking with Kendra about Megan: "Love is love." I found this a bit ironic since it was actually something I had said when talking to my mother about readintg this and she was a bit puzzled about the couple. I smiled when I saw it. 

In General: 

Scars is an extremely well written novel. It is thought provoking, heart-wrenching and yet allows the reader to come away with a sense of hope. For anyone who has suffered abuse, felt criticized or misunderstood by loved ones, etc. this book can provide hope. For those who have not been there, it is the sort of book that can provide guidance, understanding and a path to empathy. I think this novel is extremely well done and would not hesitate to recommend it. 

Scars is a recipient of...

1. A main character whom I wanted to see succeed: in learning the truth about her abuser, in finding ways to be happy, and in finding ways to (gradually) heal and live her life.

2. A strong set of secondary characters who felt compelling and real even though they were, at times, kept at length or shaded by Kendra's perceptions. 

3. A compelling plot that kept me turning pages. I could not put Scars down. 

4. A romance that was sweet and endearing, which did not undermine, trivialize or weaken the main focus of the novel. 

5. A book that I believe may truly be able to help people. I had two friends who cut back when I was in high school. I wish I'd had something like this that might have helped me understand them better, and which might have guided me in how to be there for them rather then pretending I did not hear the conversation they were having at the sleepover we were at. Looking the other way isn't something that helped anyone.

Review: The Fault In Our Stars by John Green

I am often very leery of reading books that involve any type of serious medical conditions or illness. Why? Because books like that tend to make me sad. I have many people I am close to in real life who suffer, or have suffered, from various issues and when I read fiction I tend to want to escape that -- not embrace it.

So it probably seems baffling that, with my grandma just out of the hospital and diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, that I would even consider touching any book to do with cancer. But here's the thing: I've been so stressed out over grandma that it's been blocking my ability to focus. While everyone else here is struggling externally, I'm doing my best to keep my act together, because someone has to keep grandma smiling.

It's beating the crap outta my ability to create and respond to art, though. Since "How is your book?" and "What are you doing on your blog?" are two of her favorite questions, I had to figure out a way to stick to the program, and reading this seems to have helped.

The Plot: (Summary from GoodReads)

Diagnosed with Stage IV thyroid cancer at 12, Hazel was prepared to die until, at 14, a medical miracle shrunk the tumours in her lungs... for now.

Two years post-miracle, sixteen-year-old Hazel is post-everything else, too; post-high school, post-friends and post-normalcy. And even though she could live for a long time (whatever that means), Hazel lives tethered to an oxygen tank, the tumours tenuously kept at bay with a constant chemical assault.

Enter Augustus Waters. A match made at cancer kid support group, Augustus is gorgeous, in remission, and shockingly to her, interested in Hazel. Being with Augustus is both an unexpected destination and a long-needed journey, pushing Hazel to re-examine how sickness and health, life and death, will define her and the legacy that everyone leaves behind.

As with most of the contemporary books I have read and loved, The Fault In Our Stars does not have a plot in the conventional way that I am use to thinking of 'plot' when reading stuff like fantasy, paranormal or dystopian. Rather, it feels like we meet Hazel and get to live part of her life with her. Those who don't read contemporary never seem to 'get' this. When I bought this, my boyfriend said, "Oh, God. That sounds depressing and boring." I could not disagree more.

Are there aspects of The Fault In Our Stars that are depressing? Will it make you feel like there is a hand reaching into your chest and squeezing your heart until you fear it might break? Will it reduce you to a sobbing me? Yes, oh yes. But even I, a self-proclaimed hater of books that make me cry, know that sometimes a book needs to reach out, grab the reader's heart, and send it north. Some subjects, some characters and some stories just cannot 'be' without that.

Don't get it in your head that this is just a "crying book", though. The writing in The Fault In Our Stars is truly a thing of beauty. It's honest, real and laugh out loud funny just as often or moreso then it is tear jerking. This is extremely important. The book could not have become what it is to me without either part that makes it whole.

The way that the characters act, the way that they hope and dream and support one another and grow close and struggle and succeed (or fail) ... Real life is not comprised soley of sorrow or smiles and, in wanting to be a mirror for life, contemporary fiction cannot fall into the trap of going too far in either direction. John Green nails the balance perfectly, and The Fault In Our Stars is such a great book because of this.

The Characters: 

The first thing that deserves to be said is this: Hazel's voice was absolutely amazing. I really felt that I got to know her in this book. She felt very real to me and I found myself deeply invested in what was happening to her. I admired her honesty and courage and at the same time liked the fact that her character could have a bit of bite and that she did not buy into any real type of bullshit. 

Augustus Waters is a male lead who is going to stick with me. He's definitely up there on my top five love interests in YA. What I liked so much about him is that he has this very distinct and quirky personality that compliments Hazel perfectly. His moments of strength and humor, coupled with moments of fear and doubt, made him a character I grew deeply attached to and whom I deeply admired.

The other character I really loved in this book is Issac. The role that he plays in the book from where he is at the beginning to where he ends up in the end made me really respect him. While I am not totally blind, his struggle at the beginning of the book is one of the things that initially bound me to the pages and made me feel really invested in what was going on. His struggle was one that I could, in a certain way, identify with.

The Romance: 

I really enjoyed watching Hazel and Augustus together. I think that the pace of their relationship and the way that it progressed was distinct, believable and suited the characters well. I like how everything -- how they felt about each other, how *everything* going on in their lives and how their own unique hopes and fears all added to the trials they faced and to both the joys and sorrows they had in being together. 

I also think that there is this extremely interesting shift where we see Augustus as being the stronger of the two -- more outgoing, hopeful, etc. -- at the beginning of the book, yet as it progresses we see Hazel come more and more into her own and step up to the plate. (Please realize I am *not* saying one grows at the expense of the other, for those who've read the book.) 

Despite the way everything happens in this book, the relationship between Hazel and Augustus may well be one of my favorite pairings that I have read about. Not just in YA, but *ever*. It was just that good, just that honest and just that moving. I loved it.

(SPOILER: I must warn you, if you are a romance reader, that The Fault In Our Stars does *not* have a normal HEA ending. I do not hold this against the book because the romance, while beautiful and moving, is not the main point. Hazel's growth is, and John Green gets that absolutely right.) 

In General: 

The Fault In Our Stars is a truly beautiful and moving story. But more important then that it's honest, it's real and it holds nothing back. It'll make you laugh, make you cry and make you think about what it means to be alive. Because while there is cancer in this book, while there is struggle and heartbreak, sorrow and tears, what ultimately matters is not that we will all eventually someday die, but how we all consciously, here, today, choose to live. Highly, highly recommended. I cannot praise this book enough.

Now that you've read my thoughts on The Fault In Our Stars, I'm wondering ... What are yours? Have you read it? Did you love it or hate it? If you haven't read it, do you want to read it? Or perhaps contemporary isn't your style or, like me, you're nervous about the subject matter. Whatever your view is, please feel free to speak your mind. 

Sixth Recipient Of...

1. Handles a difficult subject I normally would not touch with grace, style and class. Successfully walks the line between being tasteful about said subject while not drowning the reader in unbelievable mounds of nonsense.

2. A heroine who was distinct, unique and stood behind what she believed in. I really, really liked Hazel a lot.

3. A love interest who will definitely stick with me for a while. Augustus Waters made me smile on many occasions and watching him and Hazel together was awesome. 

4. A blend between humor and heartbreak that kept the book very real, gave it 'weight' and yet never bogged it down. 

5. Beautiful writing that suited the story and characters perfectly but that never got in the way. When I forget I'm holding a book, it's safe to say the author got it right.